i have never been one of those girls to use smiley faces after every sentence or dot my Is with hearts or stars. i guess it's the tomboy in me that has always prevented me from being too girly, "too cool" for unicorns, barbie, doodles and dresses. i was more into football (or any sport, for that matter), gi joes, cars and ninja turtles. **if a boy could do it, i could do it better.** nobody was going to convince me of anything differently.
it's funny how we when we grow-up to become functioning adults of society, we mostly stay the same as we were at 5 years old, but add little tweaks here and there. i am sitting in my office today in a skirt and a girly sweater. i feel out of place in it; **i feel like i am a fraud.** i'm used to jeans, tees, sweats, workout clothes, flip flops or running shoes. instead, i'm running around in grown-up clothes, pretending that this is normal attire for me. my co-workers know no different, either. they've only seen me in these clothes. and it makes me wonder if they think i look "normal" in them, or can they sense my discomfort? it's not that i think i look ridiculous in them; it's just that i'm not used to them.
i have always disliked wearing dresses. i remember being in the second or third grade and it was picture day at the school. my mama really wanted me to wear a dress for the picture, but there was NO WAY she was going to get me to wear a dress to school. so when it was time for pictures, my mama showed up at the school, dress in hand. i even remember the dress . . . purple flowery thing with white lace somewhere on the dress. she tells me to go into the bathroom, put on the dress and to give her my other clothes. i did, and only after taking my picture, did i realize **my mama had left me and taken the shorts and tee i had on before with her.** i had to wear the dress for the rest of the day. even though it was only for an hour or so, i remember crying -- sobbing, if you will -- that i had to wear that dress for the rest of the day. (she will prolly deny this story, but a little girl who was a tomboy could never forget something as traumatizing as having to wear a dress for the rest of the school day!)
and yet here i sit in this office, legs crossed at the ankles cuz nowadays i'm too old to put on a pair of shorts under my skirt like my 6 year old niece does. i am now ladylike. i am in frilly skirt and ruffly shirt, makeup perfectly plastered on my typically natural face. i am polite, funny, somewhat aloof. i smile when appropriate, and pay attention in class, back straight, hands folded in my lap. **ever the lady.** and it makes me realize that i don't think i would ever wanna do this fulltime.
quite honestly, it makes me appreciate the weekends, when i can roll out of bed, through on a pair of shorts or sweats or whatever the day feels like, with a tank or shirt that sometimes matches, sometimes doesn't. and my shoes don't have to be heels or cute or girly. they can be flip-flops or those running shoes. and i can shave my legs if i want to, or skip it if i don't wanna. and i can throw on a baseball cap or put my hair up in a messy ponytail and not care. **and i can be loud and obnoxious and say inappropriate things at inappropriate times and not feel bad.** i can be the tomboy that i have always been; i can be comfortable in my own skin.
but when monday morning rolls around, i get out of bed, put on my skirt or my pressed slacks, my button-up or girly sweater, my heels and **i pretend all over again.** and my co-workers have no clue that the night before, i was at my mama's house dressed in mismatched clothing, being my true self: laughing loud, talking louder, being obnoxious.
**and i think i like it that way.**
7.31.2009
7.30.2009
jobs, school and clothes
so i guess i haven't really written anything on here in quite awhile, so i thought i'd update this thing while i'm sitting here at work, doing a whole lot of nothing. it's kind of a chill day here today because half of my co-workers are leaving for el paso on monday. everyone is just kind of visiting and hanging out because those who are leaving have the day off tomorrow **and get paid for it.**
so as everyone knows, i started my job this past monday. i feel like a complete idiot and i'm not entirely sure i am even qualified for this position. however, i typically catch onto things rather quickly, so i'm hoping that **all of this will click at some point** and i will just get it. i am going to go out into the main office today to study and to try to get a bit of help from my supervisor since he has been working with this program for at least 3 years. he is one of the co-workers who leaves on monday, so that kind of sucks. he is full of knowledge on this system and he's also one of the only people who talk with me here. i must say that i find that awfully peculiar -- or perhaps i should say typical -- because i work with a lot of women. women don't like me. and none of them here talk to me. i say "good morning" to all of them each day, and they all mumble the same back to me, and look at me with a look of contempt. i don't know what that is all about, but i just try to ignore their callousness and have a good day. whatever, right?
in other news, my beau lost his job :( he was hired and three days later they put him and the other new guy in the academy to work on the same program that i am working on. he had to take a certification exam at the end of the class and failed the exam by one point. when i spoke to my supervisor about it, he said that **one and a half weeks in an academy to learn this entire program is not enough time to learn it** and that he didn't feel it was fair to either of the new guys that they were let go. that made me feel a bit better about everything and i relayed the message to my beau.
he and i have been talking for awhile about the both of us **getting back into school and finishing up our degrees.** now that he is unemployed, he and i discussed him going back and we feel like that is a good decision. he registered at CTC yesterday and is getting his stuff together for classes. the GI Bill will pay for his schooling because he served in the marines, and they will also be paying extra because he was in the armed forces on or after 9/11. i am really excited for him to get back in it and get going. he has big plans, and i know he will reach all his goals.
funny thing i have figured out about work and the business attire: a woman can pair ANY shirt she wants -- t-shirt, tank, halter, etc. -- with a blazer, nice pants / skirt and heels, and call it "business casual." **i am in love with that policy.** today i am wearing a somewhat dressy t-shirt, but to be honest . . . it's a t-shirt. has a little flower on it in the front with a scoop neck. paired it with a white blazer, blue pants and camel boots. everyone has told me how great i look today. i think that that is awesome.
**time for lunch, though.** maybe i'll write more later this afternoon.
so as everyone knows, i started my job this past monday. i feel like a complete idiot and i'm not entirely sure i am even qualified for this position. however, i typically catch onto things rather quickly, so i'm hoping that **all of this will click at some point** and i will just get it. i am going to go out into the main office today to study and to try to get a bit of help from my supervisor since he has been working with this program for at least 3 years. he is one of the co-workers who leaves on monday, so that kind of sucks. he is full of knowledge on this system and he's also one of the only people who talk with me here. i must say that i find that awfully peculiar -- or perhaps i should say typical -- because i work with a lot of women. women don't like me. and none of them here talk to me. i say "good morning" to all of them each day, and they all mumble the same back to me, and look at me with a look of contempt. i don't know what that is all about, but i just try to ignore their callousness and have a good day. whatever, right?
in other news, my beau lost his job :( he was hired and three days later they put him and the other new guy in the academy to work on the same program that i am working on. he had to take a certification exam at the end of the class and failed the exam by one point. when i spoke to my supervisor about it, he said that **one and a half weeks in an academy to learn this entire program is not enough time to learn it** and that he didn't feel it was fair to either of the new guys that they were let go. that made me feel a bit better about everything and i relayed the message to my beau.
he and i have been talking for awhile about the both of us **getting back into school and finishing up our degrees.** now that he is unemployed, he and i discussed him going back and we feel like that is a good decision. he registered at CTC yesterday and is getting his stuff together for classes. the GI Bill will pay for his schooling because he served in the marines, and they will also be paying extra because he was in the armed forces on or after 9/11. i am really excited for him to get back in it and get going. he has big plans, and i know he will reach all his goals.
funny thing i have figured out about work and the business attire: a woman can pair ANY shirt she wants -- t-shirt, tank, halter, etc. -- with a blazer, nice pants / skirt and heels, and call it "business casual." **i am in love with that policy.** today i am wearing a somewhat dressy t-shirt, but to be honest . . . it's a t-shirt. has a little flower on it in the front with a scoop neck. paired it with a white blazer, blue pants and camel boots. everyone has told me how great i look today. i think that that is awesome.
**time for lunch, though.** maybe i'll write more later this afternoon.
7.22.2009
monday, monday, monday!
that is the day i start my job. i'm so excited:
**means i get to go shopping (who cares if it's for business attire clothes! it's shopping and i haven't been able to go in MONTHS!)**
**means i get to go shopping (who cares if it's for business attire clothes! it's shopping and i haven't been able to go in MONTHS!)**
7.20.2009
7.19.2009
you're all a bunch of snollygosters!
**SUNDAY**
i watched a show today that i had DVR'd from some random channel called "the joy of lex." obviously, it was about words: their origins, how they become "official" and how they die. i must admit that i was highly intrigued. it made me think about words and their sounds and how much i love them. i don't write much anymore, but when i was in college, my major was actually english with an emphasis in creative writing, moreso poetry than anything else. **i used to write a lot, all the time.** i love everything about it. i haven't done it in a long time. i wish i had the enthusiam about it now that i had then. maybe if i was being graded still, i'd write more. we'll see. maybe i'll start writing more. who knows. but that show is where i got the word "snollygoster" from . . . i'm not even sure it's in the dictionary anymore. however, i won't tell the meaning and i'll let you all google it to find out the meaning, if you already don't know.
in other news, i said that i'd write about the job, so i guess i better do that. i interviewed last monday with a company called MTCI. i know a guy who works there and i sent him my resume; he, in turn, passed it on to the recruiters and i got a call monday morning at 9am to come in for an 11am interview. i hurridly went out to leslie's house to get an outfit for the interview and headed home to iron it. of course it was linen so it didn't iron well, but it looked good enough. i made it to the interview with 15 minutes to spare. i even beat the guy who was interviewing me to the office.
the interview went *very* well . . . he was incredibly impressed with my resume and basically told me i had the job, although he had two other people to interview. he said i'd "definitely" hear from him. so fast forward to **friday afternoon and i still haven't heard from the guy.** i started to lose hope at that point, convinced i wasn't getting the job. however, due to the urging of many people, i called and he apologized for not calling sooner. he told me i had the job, but that he didn't have a start date for me, so he was waiting to call. SOOO relieved. i am very excited and can't wait to start working! especially for those benefits :)
**MONDAY**
in other sad, devastating news. my neighbor and i have been having a mini-feud for the past couple of years. she is like 93 and a pain in the ass (pardon my french). anyway, i have always had a chainlink fence in my backyard and she went ahead and built a cedar privacy fence about 6 inches away from the chainlink. since i have lived here, there have been trees growing between the chainlink and privacy fence. she insists they're my responsibility, because when my brother-in-law lived here with my sister, he would cut the trees back for her **out of the kindness of his heart.** i got my lawn guy to agree to come in a year or two ago to cut the trees down but that he'd have to go into her backyard and remove some of the cedar planks from her fence to do it. she disagreed and they were never cut down. after that, things were prickly between us for awhile until one day they just weren't and she was speaking to me again, although clipped and in short sentences.
fast forward to this last friday. she leaves a note on my burglar bars saying she has found someone to cut down the trees, but that she will need to have them come into my backyard. i didn't want her to cut down the trees -- even though they are hers -- cuz **they provide amazing shade in the backyard** and it's a wall of green on the one side of my yard. it's very pretty. i reluctantly agreed, however, because i didn't want there to be animosity between us anymore. now i am regretting it. the green is slowly being replaced by her ugly cedar fence and the shade is disappating. i stood outside for a bit in my backyard to oversee the project and to make sure they weren't going to cut down my fig tree or any trees on my side of the fence.
[side note: the guy cutting the trees made some snotty remarks to hazel about me coming out earlier and acting as if the trees were mine (my roommate and i were listening to him talk about me through my bedroom window). so i had to get dressed to correct his remarks to hazel. i mean, really, they ARE her trees . . . there isn't much i can do aside from tell them they can't come into my backyard, and that would just make it more difficult for them but they'd get the trees down, so i viewed that as pointless. **i just wanted them to leave my trees alone.**]
hazel comes over to me as i'm standing at my fence watching and she begins to tell me how much easier it will be for me now to care for my lawn, how the trees were ruining her fence, blahblahblah. i admit that i am bitter. i may even be overreacting a bit, but whatever. those trees have been there forever and they look nice.
**old people suck.**
i watched a show today that i had DVR'd from some random channel called "the joy of lex." obviously, it was about words: their origins, how they become "official" and how they die. i must admit that i was highly intrigued. it made me think about words and their sounds and how much i love them. i don't write much anymore, but when i was in college, my major was actually english with an emphasis in creative writing, moreso poetry than anything else. **i used to write a lot, all the time.** i love everything about it. i haven't done it in a long time. i wish i had the enthusiam about it now that i had then. maybe if i was being graded still, i'd write more. we'll see. maybe i'll start writing more. who knows. but that show is where i got the word "snollygoster" from . . . i'm not even sure it's in the dictionary anymore. however, i won't tell the meaning and i'll let you all google it to find out the meaning, if you already don't know.
in other news, i said that i'd write about the job, so i guess i better do that. i interviewed last monday with a company called MTCI. i know a guy who works there and i sent him my resume; he, in turn, passed it on to the recruiters and i got a call monday morning at 9am to come in for an 11am interview. i hurridly went out to leslie's house to get an outfit for the interview and headed home to iron it. of course it was linen so it didn't iron well, but it looked good enough. i made it to the interview with 15 minutes to spare. i even beat the guy who was interviewing me to the office.
the interview went *very* well . . . he was incredibly impressed with my resume and basically told me i had the job, although he had two other people to interview. he said i'd "definitely" hear from him. so fast forward to **friday afternoon and i still haven't heard from the guy.** i started to lose hope at that point, convinced i wasn't getting the job. however, due to the urging of many people, i called and he apologized for not calling sooner. he told me i had the job, but that he didn't have a start date for me, so he was waiting to call. SOOO relieved. i am very excited and can't wait to start working! especially for those benefits :)
**MONDAY**
in other sad, devastating news. my neighbor and i have been having a mini-feud for the past couple of years. she is like 93 and a pain in the ass (pardon my french). anyway, i have always had a chainlink fence in my backyard and she went ahead and built a cedar privacy fence about 6 inches away from the chainlink. since i have lived here, there have been trees growing between the chainlink and privacy fence. she insists they're my responsibility, because when my brother-in-law lived here with my sister, he would cut the trees back for her **out of the kindness of his heart.** i got my lawn guy to agree to come in a year or two ago to cut the trees down but that he'd have to go into her backyard and remove some of the cedar planks from her fence to do it. she disagreed and they were never cut down. after that, things were prickly between us for awhile until one day they just weren't and she was speaking to me again, although clipped and in short sentences.
fast forward to this last friday. she leaves a note on my burglar bars saying she has found someone to cut down the trees, but that she will need to have them come into my backyard. i didn't want her to cut down the trees -- even though they are hers -- cuz **they provide amazing shade in the backyard** and it's a wall of green on the one side of my yard. it's very pretty. i reluctantly agreed, however, because i didn't want there to be animosity between us anymore. now i am regretting it. the green is slowly being replaced by her ugly cedar fence and the shade is disappating. i stood outside for a bit in my backyard to oversee the project and to make sure they weren't going to cut down my fig tree or any trees on my side of the fence.
[side note: the guy cutting the trees made some snotty remarks to hazel about me coming out earlier and acting as if the trees were mine (my roommate and i were listening to him talk about me through my bedroom window). so i had to get dressed to correct his remarks to hazel. i mean, really, they ARE her trees . . . there isn't much i can do aside from tell them they can't come into my backyard, and that would just make it more difficult for them but they'd get the trees down, so i viewed that as pointless. **i just wanted them to leave my trees alone.**]
hazel comes over to me as i'm standing at my fence watching and she begins to tell me how much easier it will be for me now to care for my lawn, how the trees were ruining her fence, blahblahblah. i admit that i am bitter. i may even be overreacting a bit, but whatever. those trees have been there forever and they look nice.
**old people suck.**
7.18.2009
good news . . .
i got the job! more to follow tomorrow. or the next day.
**or whenever i feel like writing**
**or whenever i feel like writing**
7.16.2009
the butcher and candlestick maker . . . what about the third?
i'm going to some friends' house tonight for dinner with my beau. we're going to watch a movie while there. i was asked to bring "something sweet" for dessert. i decided to bake cookies. i might have burned them a bit.
**a baker i am not.**
**a baker i am not.**
7.15.2009
oh to be independently wealthy!
so **i have interviewed for two jobs in the past three days.** that is very exciting news, considering i haven't had any interview in the past, um, who knows how many weeks! i am fairly confident i will be receiving a call from at least one of them, and i really hope it's for the one i want! so until then, everyone keep your fingers crossed, knock on wood and all that other superstitious crap people do, okay?
i realized when i was getting ready for the interviews that **i really have no interview clothing** to wear. step in my best friend, leslie, and clothes she bought ages ago for interviews she never went on. i had stopped out at her place last week to see her, mags and little sophie and happened to mention the interviews i was supposed to go on this week and how i had no clothes for them between talking about whatever it is we were talking about. she disappeared to her bedroom and popped back out with a brown linen suit (which, by the way, is a horrible thing to iron but so cute when worn) and a cute white blazer (which, by the way, i never wore to the interview cuz it needed to be dry-cleaned and i never got around to dropping it off there). of course, we started talking again and i left and forgot the clothes. ended up having to race to her house monday morning to get them for the interview at 11am, that was set-up that morning at 9am. gotta love the organizational skills of that one . . . i just hope that's not indicative of how the job will be, seeing that that interview was with the company i really wanna work for.
during said interview, i was informed that the dress code would be "business casual," although i was already quite aware of that because my beau works on the same contract, albeit with a different company. going through my closet that night, i realized that i have absolutely no business casual attire. no polos, no button-ups that really fit, nada. the thing is, i hate wearing button-up shirts in the first place. **button-ups belong on men or lesbians,** both of which i am not. not sure when i started thinking they belonged on lesbians, but it prolly happened around the time i worked at olive garden and was forced to wear black slacks, white button-up shirt, tie, and my hair pulled back. every time i looked in the mirror when i wore that uniform, i swear there was a man staring back at me. and ever since then, it has been a difficult thing for me to wear button-up shirts. i realize i do own a few, but those, or any new ones, will definitely not be going into my business casual attire. not unless there are frills or ruffles, so that i can feel more like a woman and less like a man (even though, admittedly, i am not sure i would be comfortable in frills and ruffles). all i know is, i am going to have go to shopping at some point soon after i get hired.
on a somewhat unrelated note, i have been unsuccessful in convincing myself to go back to the gym. oh how i have tried to tell myself it's time to get up and go at 630am when my beau leaves for work, but honestly, i'm not getting up that early for anything unless i'm getting paid to! and so i always roll over, turn off any alarms and go right back to sleep. until i wake up, whenever that may be. typically, it's mid-afternoon and i convince myself i have things to do, errands to run or people to see and so i must pass up the gym. i think back to how i used to get up EVERY morning at 5am, come hell or high water, and trek the 20 minutes one way to the gym, work out for a good two hours, come home, shower, change and go to work. and then go back for another two hours in the afternoon after work. what was i thinking?!?! actually, i know that i looked better then and that i was happier with myself then. but for the life of me, i cannot convince myself that that is a good idea for me to do anymore. i just come up with excuses. i am hoping that once i start working again (whenever that will be), i will get back into some sort of routine and head straight to the gym after work. until then, **i am going to stop lying to myself** and everyone else and face the fact that right now, the gym and i are no longer friends. we might reconcile one day, but today is not that day. happy? i know i am.
one thing i am looking forward to about this job i really want and hope i get, is the benefits! it has been so long since i had a job that offered REAL benefits. granted, they only pay 80% of medical, but that is better than nothing! i will also get full dental (which is awesome cuz i have that blasted cavity i still have to get filled and then maybe i can get braces on my bottom teeth again to fix that one tooth that is out of line (yes, i'm OCD about my teeth)) and have the option of enrolling in a 401k (which is awesome and or course i'm doing). i am so excited about said benefits -- medical, mostly -- cuz i have been sick recently. not sure what is going on, but every single time i eat ANYTHING, i get sick. and i mean S-I-C-K. spending hours in the bathroom, not sure if i'm going to puke or let it come out the other end (sorry for being somewhat mildly graphic there, but i needed you all to get the point). and this happens in the middle of the night sometimes, hours after i've eaten, for hours at a time. i get the chills, i feel dizzy, and i am in agonizing pain. my mama thinks that it might possibly be an ulcer and / or stress-induced, and i'm inclined to believe her at this point. **not having a steady income and bills piling up has put an undo amount of stress on me lately.** i'm now just waiting to puke up blood before i pay out of pocket to see the doctor. hoping i get hired very quickly so i can go and have tests run or whatever it is that they are going to do. heaven knows i'd like one night of uninterrupted sleep!
what else, what else. oh . . . **i am selling a brand new 8x external DVD-RW from dell.** my beau needed to get a new laptop before heading to kuwait for a year because his is, well, a piece of crap. continuously freezing, shutting itself down, running slower than whatever runs slow in the first place. so we signed up for a dell account to get the computer for him. i needed an external DVD drive for my computer since i have this little tiny laptop and it doesn't have one. dell had their drives on sale, so i added that to the cart, along with a messenger bag for the laptop and an external hard drive, to put all my music on. somehow everything was shipped twice and i was charged twice on my card. when i called today to find out about returning everything (excluding the extra hard drive cuz my beau is keeping that for his new laptop so that he can have movies and music for his year in kuwait), the guy offered me a $40 credit on my account if i kept all the other stuff. the bag is really cute -- red and black -- and would be perfect for things other than a 9" screen laptop (so i am selling the second one of those, too) and the DVD-RW is still in the box. i paid $89 for it and am asking $60. so keep that in mind if you know anyone who might want it. and i am even willing to ship it to whomever buys it (keep that in mind, john and hayley). otherwise, ask around and see if you know anyone who wants either the bag or the DVD thing. i can provide pictures, should you want them. i'd post them now, however i haven't taken any and i'm being lazy and totally laying on the couch as i write this. so there.
can't think of anything else to write, really. i might try to take a quick power nap since last night was one of those nights where i was up sick for hours and i really didn't sleep well. once my beau gets home, we're going to dinner at mama's and then swimming afterwards:
**i sure hope that the water stays warm!**
i realized when i was getting ready for the interviews that **i really have no interview clothing** to wear. step in my best friend, leslie, and clothes she bought ages ago for interviews she never went on. i had stopped out at her place last week to see her, mags and little sophie and happened to mention the interviews i was supposed to go on this week and how i had no clothes for them between talking about whatever it is we were talking about. she disappeared to her bedroom and popped back out with a brown linen suit (which, by the way, is a horrible thing to iron but so cute when worn) and a cute white blazer (which, by the way, i never wore to the interview cuz it needed to be dry-cleaned and i never got around to dropping it off there). of course, we started talking again and i left and forgot the clothes. ended up having to race to her house monday morning to get them for the interview at 11am, that was set-up that morning at 9am. gotta love the organizational skills of that one . . . i just hope that's not indicative of how the job will be, seeing that that interview was with the company i really wanna work for.
during said interview, i was informed that the dress code would be "business casual," although i was already quite aware of that because my beau works on the same contract, albeit with a different company. going through my closet that night, i realized that i have absolutely no business casual attire. no polos, no button-ups that really fit, nada. the thing is, i hate wearing button-up shirts in the first place. **button-ups belong on men or lesbians,** both of which i am not. not sure when i started thinking they belonged on lesbians, but it prolly happened around the time i worked at olive garden and was forced to wear black slacks, white button-up shirt, tie, and my hair pulled back. every time i looked in the mirror when i wore that uniform, i swear there was a man staring back at me. and ever since then, it has been a difficult thing for me to wear button-up shirts. i realize i do own a few, but those, or any new ones, will definitely not be going into my business casual attire. not unless there are frills or ruffles, so that i can feel more like a woman and less like a man (even though, admittedly, i am not sure i would be comfortable in frills and ruffles). all i know is, i am going to have go to shopping at some point soon after i get hired.
on a somewhat unrelated note, i have been unsuccessful in convincing myself to go back to the gym. oh how i have tried to tell myself it's time to get up and go at 630am when my beau leaves for work, but honestly, i'm not getting up that early for anything unless i'm getting paid to! and so i always roll over, turn off any alarms and go right back to sleep. until i wake up, whenever that may be. typically, it's mid-afternoon and i convince myself i have things to do, errands to run or people to see and so i must pass up the gym. i think back to how i used to get up EVERY morning at 5am, come hell or high water, and trek the 20 minutes one way to the gym, work out for a good two hours, come home, shower, change and go to work. and then go back for another two hours in the afternoon after work. what was i thinking?!?! actually, i know that i looked better then and that i was happier with myself then. but for the life of me, i cannot convince myself that that is a good idea for me to do anymore. i just come up with excuses. i am hoping that once i start working again (whenever that will be), i will get back into some sort of routine and head straight to the gym after work. until then, **i am going to stop lying to myself** and everyone else and face the fact that right now, the gym and i are no longer friends. we might reconcile one day, but today is not that day. happy? i know i am.
one thing i am looking forward to about this job i really want and hope i get, is the benefits! it has been so long since i had a job that offered REAL benefits. granted, they only pay 80% of medical, but that is better than nothing! i will also get full dental (which is awesome cuz i have that blasted cavity i still have to get filled and then maybe i can get braces on my bottom teeth again to fix that one tooth that is out of line (yes, i'm OCD about my teeth)) and have the option of enrolling in a 401k (which is awesome and or course i'm doing). i am so excited about said benefits -- medical, mostly -- cuz i have been sick recently. not sure what is going on, but every single time i eat ANYTHING, i get sick. and i mean S-I-C-K. spending hours in the bathroom, not sure if i'm going to puke or let it come out the other end (sorry for being somewhat mildly graphic there, but i needed you all to get the point). and this happens in the middle of the night sometimes, hours after i've eaten, for hours at a time. i get the chills, i feel dizzy, and i am in agonizing pain. my mama thinks that it might possibly be an ulcer and / or stress-induced, and i'm inclined to believe her at this point. **not having a steady income and bills piling up has put an undo amount of stress on me lately.** i'm now just waiting to puke up blood before i pay out of pocket to see the doctor. hoping i get hired very quickly so i can go and have tests run or whatever it is that they are going to do. heaven knows i'd like one night of uninterrupted sleep!
what else, what else. oh . . . **i am selling a brand new 8x external DVD-RW from dell.** my beau needed to get a new laptop before heading to kuwait for a year because his is, well, a piece of crap. continuously freezing, shutting itself down, running slower than whatever runs slow in the first place. so we signed up for a dell account to get the computer for him. i needed an external DVD drive for my computer since i have this little tiny laptop and it doesn't have one. dell had their drives on sale, so i added that to the cart, along with a messenger bag for the laptop and an external hard drive, to put all my music on. somehow everything was shipped twice and i was charged twice on my card. when i called today to find out about returning everything (excluding the extra hard drive cuz my beau is keeping that for his new laptop so that he can have movies and music for his year in kuwait), the guy offered me a $40 credit on my account if i kept all the other stuff. the bag is really cute -- red and black -- and would be perfect for things other than a 9" screen laptop (so i am selling the second one of those, too) and the DVD-RW is still in the box. i paid $89 for it and am asking $60. so keep that in mind if you know anyone who might want it. and i am even willing to ship it to whomever buys it (keep that in mind, john and hayley). otherwise, ask around and see if you know anyone who wants either the bag or the DVD thing. i can provide pictures, should you want them. i'd post them now, however i haven't taken any and i'm being lazy and totally laying on the couch as i write this. so there.
can't think of anything else to write, really. i might try to take a quick power nap since last night was one of those nights where i was up sick for hours and i really didn't sleep well. once my beau gets home, we're going to dinner at mama's and then swimming afterwards:
**i sure hope that the water stays warm!**
7.07.2009
a day in the life . . .
**being sick sucks.**
i have had some sort of stomach flu for the past two days. it started sunday evening and i am still feeling it today. i am very bored since i can't be away from a toilet for more than 10 minutes at a time. i have been mostly laying around the house and **doing a whole lot of nothing.** i managed to water the back lawn today and i'm going to venture into the kitchen to make chili in a minute, if i have all the ingredients. if not, my beau will just have to have turkey salad or something for dinner. i feel like i should have dinner on the table since he is at work everyday.
and speaking of work . . . he is thoroughly enjoying his new job. he says that the people are all very nice and that they have all the cokes someone could want to drink **for free.** he assures me, however, that he is not drinking any of them. we are supposed to be eating very healthy and not having coke **although i admit i've had a lot of sprite over the last couple of days due to my illness** and going to the gym. so far, i've accomplished a bit of the healthy eating. but i guess that is veering off subject. so back to his job. so his supervisor (also the guy who hired him) told him that one of the girls they have working in kuwait is prolly going to be quitting in the next week or so. she is in kuwait right now and is miserable. she is due home for her r&r next week and he doesn't believe she will be back.
**enter my resume**
my beau's supervisor told him that i am the top candidate being considered for her position, should she quit. he had already looked over my resume and apparently everyone there is pretty impressed with my "skills" and computer knowledge. i am hoping that she quits, as horrible as that sounds. i am looking forward to going back to work and the money to be made in kuwait is just ridiculous. so everyone cross your fingers and hope that i get that job!
i guess it's time for me to throw something together for dinner. if it's chili, it will take a couple of hours to cook. i still don't know if i have everything, but if i don't, maybe i can convince my mama or heather to run to the store for me. **heaven knows i hate using public restrooms.**
i have had some sort of stomach flu for the past two days. it started sunday evening and i am still feeling it today. i am very bored since i can't be away from a toilet for more than 10 minutes at a time. i have been mostly laying around the house and **doing a whole lot of nothing.** i managed to water the back lawn today and i'm going to venture into the kitchen to make chili in a minute, if i have all the ingredients. if not, my beau will just have to have turkey salad or something for dinner. i feel like i should have dinner on the table since he is at work everyday.
and speaking of work . . . he is thoroughly enjoying his new job. he says that the people are all very nice and that they have all the cokes someone could want to drink **for free.** he assures me, however, that he is not drinking any of them. we are supposed to be eating very healthy and not having coke **although i admit i've had a lot of sprite over the last couple of days due to my illness** and going to the gym. so far, i've accomplished a bit of the healthy eating. but i guess that is veering off subject. so back to his job. so his supervisor (also the guy who hired him) told him that one of the girls they have working in kuwait is prolly going to be quitting in the next week or so. she is in kuwait right now and is miserable. she is due home for her r&r next week and he doesn't believe she will be back.
**enter my resume**
my beau's supervisor told him that i am the top candidate being considered for her position, should she quit. he had already looked over my resume and apparently everyone there is pretty impressed with my "skills" and computer knowledge. i am hoping that she quits, as horrible as that sounds. i am looking forward to going back to work and the money to be made in kuwait is just ridiculous. so everyone cross your fingers and hope that i get that job!
i guess it's time for me to throw something together for dinner. if it's chili, it will take a couple of hours to cook. i still don't know if i have everything, but if i don't, maybe i can convince my mama or heather to run to the store for me. **heaven knows i hate using public restrooms.**
7.05.2009
drains, lemon tarts and jobs
so my beau and i have been doing some stuff around the house to clean and whatnot. my roommate also helps me a lot, too. but last night, when i was getting ready to get out of the shower, i looked down and decided it was time to clean out the drain. i got all the hair off the top of it, which honestly wasn't that much cuz i clean it frequently. however, i couldn't get down under the drain cuz there are no screws holding the drain in and i have tried to pull it off several times, to no avail.
step in my white knight.
he got a pair of old tweezers and popped the drain off. i won't proceed to tell you all what nastiness existed below the surface, but i will say that it was grody enough for me to leave the bathroom so i wouldn't puke! i guess it's cuz i used to have a recurring dream a few years back in which **someone would force me to eat the hair and gunk**from the drain. now, i can't look at it without thinking about that dream and making myself wanna puke everywhere.
okay . . . now that i blogged about that dithguthing topic, i will blog about another: iced lemon pound cake from starbucks.
this used to be my **favorite**snack EVER. even though it has like 86 carbs PER SLICE, i used to get it every week, on either saturday or sunday. my beau and i went to get an iced passion lemonade today from there and he really wanted a treat. so he ordered that. i took a bite and it was awful. the cake is super dry and the frosting on it is like confectioner's (is that the word i'm looking for?) icing . . . sugar and water. it's pretty horrible. my suggestion if you're there and looking for something sweet and lemony? the lemon tart. almost perfection.
and another side note: **my beau starts his new job tomorrow.** we are both pretty excited about this, although i admit i will prolly spend most of the day bored out of my mind since he'll be gone. i'm hoping (and cross your fingers here) to start up at the gym hardcore tomorrow. we'll see how that goes. heaven knows i was just looking at some pictures of me at the lake on july 3rd and i need to lose a few pounds!
once again **wish me luck!**
step in my white knight.
he got a pair of old tweezers and popped the drain off. i won't proceed to tell you all what nastiness existed below the surface, but i will say that it was grody enough for me to leave the bathroom so i wouldn't puke! i guess it's cuz i used to have a recurring dream a few years back in which **someone would force me to eat the hair and gunk**from the drain. now, i can't look at it without thinking about that dream and making myself wanna puke everywhere.
okay . . . now that i blogged about that dithguthing topic, i will blog about another: iced lemon pound cake from starbucks.
this used to be my **favorite**snack EVER. even though it has like 86 carbs PER SLICE, i used to get it every week, on either saturday or sunday. my beau and i went to get an iced passion lemonade today from there and he really wanted a treat. so he ordered that. i took a bite and it was awful. the cake is super dry and the frosting on it is like confectioner's (is that the word i'm looking for?) icing . . . sugar and water. it's pretty horrible. my suggestion if you're there and looking for something sweet and lemony? the lemon tart. almost perfection.
and another side note: **my beau starts his new job tomorrow.** we are both pretty excited about this, although i admit i will prolly spend most of the day bored out of my mind since he'll be gone. i'm hoping (and cross your fingers here) to start up at the gym hardcore tomorrow. we'll see how that goes. heaven knows i was just looking at some pictures of me at the lake on july 3rd and i need to lose a few pounds!
once again **wish me luck!**
7.04.2009
the third and fourth
yesterday was a good day. heidi's family is here from arkansas and we all decided to go down to inks lake state park. her family, mama and daddy, me and my beau, scott and val all loaded up and we headed that way. heidi grabbed some chicken from walmart as well as some chips and drinks. we had an informal picnic and played games. jacob even beat me in scrabble! it was a bit hot, though, and i never swim in lake water, so we left pretty quickly. stayed about two hours before we rolled out. everyone followed shortly afterwards. we came back to the house and i brought some movies i rented for the kids. had i known that "hotel for dogs" and "high school musical 3" were going to be so bad, i would've left them at the redbox! i also rented "spiderwick chronicles" but they haven't watched that yet. maybe tomorrow after church.
today has been pretty . . . good, i guess. i slept in really late and then headed to mama's house for the festivities. we had a family barbecue at 2pm and ate *tons* of good food. everyone went swimming after and then headed onto fort hood for fireworks. i opted not to go, though . . . too hot and too crowded. so basically, we're sitting at mama's house while mostly everyone else is gone. chad and scott are here with a couple of their friends. honestly, i'm kind of waiting for them to leave so that my beau and i can go swimming. we'll see how long that takes.
anyhow . . . i am posting some pics of our time at the lake yesterday. enjoy and happy fourth to everyone!
today has been pretty . . . good, i guess. i slept in really late and then headed to mama's house for the festivities. we had a family barbecue at 2pm and ate *tons* of good food. everyone went swimming after and then headed onto fort hood for fireworks. i opted not to go, though . . . too hot and too crowded. so basically, we're sitting at mama's house while mostly everyone else is gone. chad and scott are here with a couple of their friends. honestly, i'm kind of waiting for them to leave so that my beau and i can go swimming. we'll see how long that takes.
anyhow . . . i am posting some pics of our time at the lake yesterday. enjoy and happy fourth to everyone!
7.01.2009
woohoo!
**good news** on the job front . . . well for my beau, not me! but we're happy that he has finally gotten and accepted a job over in kuwait, working with a company called mclane advanced technologies. his job starts monday in temple. he will complete 10 days of training for his job here in temple, then will head to fort benning, georgia for more extensive training and then go to kuwait from there. i am thinking of joining him in georgia for a bit, but that all depends on the money situation.
i am also supposedly being considered for a job in kuwait with mclane, too. i am happy for that. the pay is ridiculously good over there and that would help me out tremendously. i would be able to **get completely out of debt** in less than a year and buy a car with cash. by two years, if i decided to keep that job, i would be able to put half down (at least) on my house. so everyone keep their fingers crossed for me. they told me i should hear by next month since they are only alloted a certain amount of positions per month. hoping **just hoping** that i get a call from them.
not much going on today at the moment. just hanging out at mama's house with all of the kids. **we're getting ready to BBQ** some hotdogs, fish and chicken for lunch. hotdogs will be for the kids, of course. chicken and fish are for the adults and perhaps the older kids. glad i don't have to eat the hotdogs . . . they are dithguthting! tonight, i'm heading to austin to see maxwell in concert with my beau. he surprised me last night with tickets to the show, and i am super excited.
anyhow, gotta run. kids are starving and **so am i!**
i am also supposedly being considered for a job in kuwait with mclane, too. i am happy for that. the pay is ridiculously good over there and that would help me out tremendously. i would be able to **get completely out of debt** in less than a year and buy a car with cash. by two years, if i decided to keep that job, i would be able to put half down (at least) on my house. so everyone keep their fingers crossed for me. they told me i should hear by next month since they are only alloted a certain amount of positions per month. hoping **just hoping** that i get a call from them.
not much going on today at the moment. just hanging out at mama's house with all of the kids. **we're getting ready to BBQ** some hotdogs, fish and chicken for lunch. hotdogs will be for the kids, of course. chicken and fish are for the adults and perhaps the older kids. glad i don't have to eat the hotdogs . . . they are dithguthting! tonight, i'm heading to austin to see maxwell in concert with my beau. he surprised me last night with tickets to the show, and i am super excited.
anyhow, gotta run. kids are starving and **so am i!**
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